2011 is almost done. What's on the horizon?

Blog friends! Hello there. I've been neglecting you big time. I always say I'm going to come back and post more, and then I fail miserably to follow through. But this time. I MEAN it! I'd like to start by sharing some reflections on this last year of my life:

There's the obvious: Wedding. Marriage. Awesomeness.
I'm probably the happiest I've been in life in a looooooong time. Recognizing that there is someone in your life so special that you want to stand by this person forever is a huge enough revelation in and of itself. But taking the step of verbally committing to that person in front of your closest friends and family is something so profound I can hardly find the words to talk about it. I don't know that having a piece of paper that says I'm now legally related to someone else has changed our relationship significantly, but I am still as in love as I was just over 6 six years ago when I first laid eyes on a tall, geeky blond boy in Belgian restaurant. I am so excited about our future and what we can accomplish together!

Then there's the money bit.
We spent a lot of it this year. On our wedding and honeymoon. While I generally have no regrets, I kinda wish we has spent less on the wedding. It was an amazing day - literally everything fell into place as I had imagined it. Everyone had a great time, and in fact, people are still talking about it. I have gorgeous photos (that I can't stop looking at). But lately I've been fantasizing about real estate, and there is so much affordable property on the market in our neighborhood (which we love, like, a lot, and never want to leave) right now it pains me to know that we just don't have the funds to capitalize on the opportunity. And the question lurking in the back of my mind is when we do have the money in a couple years' time, will we be able to find what we want and can afford? So next year, I think it may be time to institute some financial goals and go on a little post-wedding money diet.

The J-O-B...
Well, friends, this is the part I'm most excited to share. In my heart of hearts, I love what I do. Working in the museum world I think has ultimately made me smarter. And I've made some great connections. However, it's very cyclical and the kinds of challenges I like to handle are becoming fewer. But having to plan my wedding this year has unleashed this insane creative energy that I had no idea I really had in me. I've always been a creative, crafty person. But I was able to take lots of already-great ideas out there in the world of weddings and cobble them together with my own spin, feel, vibe, and creative touches. And I've never had more fun! My mind is still racing with with ideas, talents and skills I'd like to hone, but most importantly, the prospect of going out on my own. It's always been part of my long term plan to do my own thing eventually, but I just feel like I kind of have this momentum going right now, so why not harness that sooner rather than later? I have a pipe dream that I'll share with you later on, but I would like 2012 to be the year when I figure it out. What is it, of my many skills and talents, that I can offer that is special, useful to people, and at which I can successfully keep running long term and support myself? Excited to share some of my ideas in another post, but my goal is to do as much as possible! Ok, here's a little taste: it involves making awesome, interesting and beautiful things!

While 2011 brought together a lot of people, it made me realize that as time passes, I feel further away everyone. My local circle of friends is dwindling. On the one side, I was all over Facebook and discovered Twitter this year, and have gained a bunch of awesome virtual connections out there who I am excited to tap into for creative resources next year. But on the other, I realized that I need to make a bigger effort on cultivating some offline relationships. So as part of my longer-term adventure into becoming self-employed, I am going to be more social in 2012. I'm going to shut down the laptop more and stay at home a little less. Step one: I joined a Monday night bowling league! Don't rub your eyes - I actually just said bowling league! I used to play in a volleyball league here in NY pretty regularly, but a series of related and unrelated injuries kept me from re-joining. I may eventually go back to it when I'm feeling a little more in-shape, but bowling requires little physical involvement so I figured it would be a good place to start.

Last but not least, I'm going to work on my health. I was able to lose 20lbs in honor of looking fab in white dress for a day, but shortly thereafter, I took the road many newlyweds take. We've been eating out a lot. I've been buying my lunch every day. I've gone to the gym twice since the wedding. As of today, I've gained back about 10 of those 20lbs. No bueno! This year, I am going to return to healthier habits and keep it that way. So prepare yourselves for the occasional health/recipe/food amazingness posts next year.

As you may have already discovered by now, all of the above things are linked together! Having better job perspective and a goal to move toward means I can make more time to focus on those things. Which means more time to do healthy stuff like cook and go to the gym. And more time to do things that will help me be more social and launch my own business (flower-arranging classes, anyone?). Which means ultimately saving money and making money at the same time!

I'm not typically one to be excited by a new year. To be honest, I think I'm more excited about 2012 than I was about 2011. Seriously, I'm just bursting at the seams with all the ideas and plans and things I can do over the next 12 months. I hope you'll all still be around to watch and help and offer advice and perspective. I will definitely need it!

I sincerely wish you all a HAPPY new year and hope you find ways to celebrate all year round! I tip my glass to you! Until 2012...

(source)

Taming the Biggest Wedding Beast Yet: The Guest List!

This post is long overdue, and I know it's not going to be a revelation to anyone when I say it: Keep your guest list in check! It's been a rocky road for me & my fiance - and in fact, is one of the few moments in the whole process where I became a bridezilla. I wanted a wedding of 75-100 people (and closer to the 75 end than 100). I'm not getting it. It happened with the best intentions, but still brought me several ulcer-inducing moments. Believe me, sticking to your guns when it comes to your guest list is easier said than done, I know. So here are a few helpful tips I wish I had had in my back pocket for you brides-to-be out there:

1) Make a budget and stick to it! Whether you have a target number of people in mind first or a specific venue your hearts are set on, the first order of business you & your new fiance should address is making a wedding budget. The interwebs is a great place to do research, and many blogs I've talked about in other posts have forums where real brides all over post budgets or estimates for various services that can help you plan. Be realistic about what you can save and what your parents may or may not contribute. It may also be helpful to prioritize and have a wish list, in the event that you have some funds freed up and want to add on, or you choose to spend more on one thing you know where you can cut back on something else. Once you've decided how much you want to spend, do not go over. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. No matter how much your parents may want that ice sculpture. And if they want to give you money for that specifically if it's that important to them, fine. But we'll discuss that more in #2.

2) Know your limits. Have a serious conversation with your fiance about what's really important to you, and how you're going to pay for it. If either set of parents wants to contribute, make sure you and your fiance are clear about what that means. If you are ok with them participating or having a say in your decisions *because* they are contributing something, say so. Or if you prefer their contributions go to specific things (flowers, cake, transport, etc.) be very clear about that. Or, if you suspect that you may be bullied by the parental dollar, insist on paying for everything yourselves. It may mean you'll have a leaner wedding or something a little less extravagant than you imagined, but hey, you'll have the wedding you really truly wanted. And you can tell your parents to contribute to your honeymoon :)

3) Insist on priorities. If the parents have a set number of people they want to invite that you & your fiance deem reasonable, that's great. It can stop there. In most cases though, the sad truth is that your parents probably see your wedding as a way to show off their awesomeness to the whole dang world. I can't blame them for that. Translation: they will want to invite the far reaches of your family, their friends, their frenemies, their co-workers, their postal worker, you name it. Insist on having an A, B and even C list. The reality is that for whatever reason, not everyone on your A list is going to be able to make it. So if having as many people as possible at your wedding means a lot to you & your respective families, having backups are great. Not to mention that you have clear direction come RSVP time, and everyone is happy.

4) Set up artificial boundaries. If you want a target of 80 people to attend your wedding, you could choose a venue with a max of 85-90. Or, if you are dealing with a BYO-type place that you love, cost might also be a great deterrent. Say you want to have your wedding at a historic location that only allows tented receptions, which means you have to rent e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. This may bring your per person cost to, say, $250/person and you've decided that's awesome because it means you can only realistically invite 50 people. That way, you can blame it on "circumstances beyond your control." It may not always work, but it's something to think about.

I hope this is helpful. Your guest list affects almost everything else in your budget, and 10 extra people that you didn't anticipate or 10 people that don't show up can be equally nerve-wracking and stress-inducing. Save yourself a headache (or ulcer) and take hold of your guest list by the horns and be the boss of it. You'll be happy that you did!

Gagnant à nouveau!

So I also speak French. On occasion. What little I can remember! So remember when I was talking about my strategy for paying for my wedding? Well, it's working - still! Since then I have won two small but very cool and helpful giveaways! Printable patterns I can use to jazz up our reception decor, and a gift certificate to the elegant and always classy Bonita J jewelry boutique! Yay! I also found a super great deal on a "Day of Coordinator" for the wedding.... The hits just keep 'on rolling! I'm so inspired that I think I'm going to start featuring a weekly round-up of the best discounts and giveaways out there! Might as well share the love - at some point I won't have anything left to win!

To your health (and pocketbook)!

In an effort to begin the wedding weight loss, I've returned to the gym as of today. Wanna know a l'il secret though? The wedding alone and looking good in a white dress wasn't really motivation enough on it's own. Nope. Sad but true. The real reason I'm returning to a regular gym routine: dollah dollah bills y'all! I recently learned that my company's new health insurance will reimburse you up to between $200 & $300 every six months for a mere 50 visits. That works out to be roughly twice a week. Living in NYC, I have been victim to exorbitant gym membership fees; but this new incentive softens the blow. Assuming I get the lower end of the scale, my net effective monthly membership cost goes from $79 to about $46. Not too shabby! 49 visits to go!

From what I hear, this seems to an across-the-board policy being implemented my many many insurance companies. Makes sense. If you're going help people get healthy and stay healthy, understanding that access to exercise and regular activity is often cost prohibitive to many, why not help them out a little? So I encourage everyone out there to start looking into their health insurance company's extra benefits - you may find something very useful and something that will put a few more Benjamins back in your pocket! (On a side note, I've also noticed many insurance companies are now starting to cover acupuncturists and nutritionists like a specialist doctor - that means you only have to pay a copay! Such a great thing for anyone who benefits from alternative medicine and more holistic health care).

It's Black...Weekend!

The tradition of Black Friday seems like it's slowly being tossed out the window these days! In the spirit of money saving, I suppose, many sales have been extended through the weekend, and some even started on Thanksgiving day (yeesh!). I was really into Black Friday at one point. About 2 years ago, I dragged my mom to Woodbury Commons with me for their "Midnight Madness". Surprisingly, it was not too crowded, and what better way to digest your humongo turkey day feast than to burn some calories shopping, right? Also, I'm not a morning person, so to be home and in bed by 1AM without fear of the 5AM wake-up call was bliss!

However, a warning about many of these Black Friday deals. Some of them are great for holiday shopping, and who doesn't want to save money when your gift list is on the long side? But if you're picking up some gifts for yourself along the way, my advice is to wait a little if you can. Case in point: on the above-mentioned shopping trip, I purchased a pair of Kenneth Cole knee high, low heeled black boots from the outlet. They were/are (still wearing them with pride!) beautiful, and I thought, what a bargain, when the final price tag was about $120 (original price was close to $200). Well, my mom bought a similar pair, and ended up returning them about a month later, and to my chagrin, she reported that the boots I purchased were now an extra 50% off the sale price, bringing the cost down to about $75 or $80. Booo. You might imagine the sheer frustration I felt. Since they were so perfect, I had been wearing them with glee nearly every day since I bought them and tossed the receipt, so sadly I couldn't pull the ole swap-a-roo (buy a new pair, and then return them with the old receipt) or request a price adjustment to get some of my money back.

This year, I was much wiser. I spent Black Friday trolling the interwebs for deals in my pjs. In general, my new favoritest thing is etsy. Wow, the abundance of things available is endless! I first discovered etsy through various and sundry wedding blogs I've been following, and have scored numerous deals on a few key wedding items (hair goodies and my veil!). But via Twitter, I've also see a TON of mega discount codes for various shops (20-30% off!). But besides the variety of things you can get, what's so great about etsy you say? One word: HANDMADE! Ok, two words: VINTAGE! What can be cooler than being the recipient of a near one-of-a-kind item? Or one-of-a-kind, top quality vintage item? These are independent sellers who use their skills to craft beautiful things or collect really cool stuff. And because you're buying virtually, no overhead costs to the sellers = bigger savings for you! Home decor, stationary, patterns & raw materials, handmade/sewn clothes, wedding favors, you name it - it's on etsy! Locavore? You can even find sellers by zip code so you can buy from your neighbor(s), literally! Get on the etsy train folks! You'll thank me, I promise :)

Some of my favorites:
Funky vintage things:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/MilkasTreasures

Gorgeous vintage style accessories:
http://www.etsy.com/shop/beadflorajewels

Salted Caramels, my obsession!
http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheCaramelJar

Clever wine glass/beer bottle tags - essential for any entertainer!
http://www.etsy.com/shop/clinks

A financial strategy for weddings that is underrated

So I wanted to focus today's post on paying for weddings. While my mom will be contributing a generous amount to cover our wedding costs (a little more than 1/2), my FH & I will still be left with some hefty bills, including paying for our honeymoon. Enter: Wedding giveaways! Unconventional, yes. But generally speaking, the odds are in your favor, and if you could end up winning lots of things large and small that will save you money. And all the better if you win items or monetary amounts for things that you can only use for the wedding. Better to invest your money in things that you will use again anyway, no?

Also, the internet (Twitter, Facebook) is your friend! Since we are not having a super traditional wedding, I have been trolling the internet for ideas and inspiration. I've found at least 10 wedding blogs that are utterly amazing resources, but the really beautiful thing is that most of these blogs have relationships with vendors, and that means giveaways! I've probably entered about 30 giveaways thus far, and have won 3 of them!

Our biggest win to date is our wedding photography! Huge coup, right? We are getting married in the Hudson Valley, and in my research for photographers from/familiar with the area in last spring, I happened upon the blog of J.Castro Photography and started reading through some archived posts. I took note that last year he offered a contest, and as soon as he announced the 2011 contest, I was in it to win it. And we did! We still paid a deposit, but as the winners, we get that money back in album/print credits! So our wedding photography in the end is costing us between 1/3 and 1/4 of what it would have been.

Another awesome win: invitation design by little birdie studio! I was going to ask one of my graphic designer pals to help on this one, but I won it instead! It will probably preserve our friendship in the end anyway, and despite said designer being on the up & coming side, I couldn't be happier with the results so far! She was supposed to design just the invites but even offered to do our Save the Dates! Sweet!

Lastly, I won a $100 shopping spree to a fantastic etsy shop, Bead Flora Jewels, for fun accessories. I chose to get a custom made, awesome beaded hair piece and an ivory clutch! I may even splurge and buy some shoe clips for the big day too :)

So ladies & germs, the lesson here is just try it out! It's always free to put your name in the hat for these things, and the amount of entries varies greatly so chances are you'll enter something with not too much competition and victory will be yours! But wait? Where might one find out about these giveaways? Here's a short list of some cool giveaways going on now that are just super cool:

A great site that posts all kinds of wedding giveaways, no signing up necessary:
http://www.luckybridegiveaways.com/

A wonderful lady who has a weekly giveaway on her blog:
http://www.brendasweddingblog.com/blogs/category/giveaways

A great. ECO-FRIENDLY multi-item giveaway with lots of really useful stuff! And as a bonus, you can buy and sell all kinds of wedding stuff, saving yourself lots of Benjamins :)
http://www.smartbrideboutique.com/blog/green-wedding-contest-win-an-eco-prize-pack/20101101/511/

A $25 certificate to BonitaJ jewelry's shop, posted on Nutritionist Reviews' blog:
http://www.nutritionistreviews.com/2010/11/25-bonita-j-giveaway.html

I could go on, but Google is your friend!

Happy Tuesday!

Oh, and by the way

In case anyone hasn't been following the NY governor's race, this guy is A-MAZING! Speaking of wealth, we need more folks like this in NYC, advocating for the city to stop forcing its residents to waste their hard-earning money on sub-standard housing. Enjoy!

The rent is too damn high!

It's been awile... I know

Wow! It's November already. Sigh. I know I've been MIA for a loooong time, but remember all that free time I was complaining about not having? Well life set sail on a slow moving ship after late May, and I have been devoting my life to planning the wedding and sticking to our budget! I'm in the midst of so many things right now and I'm just bursting with excitement!

On the wedding front, we've managed to book all but one of our major vendors (and the last will happen w/in the next few weeks or so) - awesome. The not so awesome part? How 'bout our budget being eaten up rather quickly? Between mid-June when we booked our *fantastic* venue and now, I've bought my dress, and we've made deposits on our ceremony musicians, a band for the reception, and paid for our engagement photo session. The florist is our last item to tick off booking for 2010. We were doing well until I decided to buy my dress at Kleinfeld's and we caved in and booked a live band. My mom offered to pay the difference of what I had budgeted for my dress and the final cost of the dress which was great, but I still have to pay for alterations - boo. And the band really only was $600 above our budget, but it means I'll need to finagle some other things I had been dreaming up (or not do them at all) so we can afford everything else we actually still have to pay for. I'm socking away lots of money, and the fiance is too, but I'm still a little nervous about where we'll be financially when we really have to start paying for stuff! But some things that have helped out immensely: we won a photography contest and now have (nearly) free wedding photography; I won a giveaway that paid for some cute bridal accessories; and I won free invitation design! I've been stalking lots of wedding blogs like a hawk, and hopefully my winning streak will continue and I'll win more awesome stuff!

This year on my job scene had been going well I think. My 2 yr anniversary was in late September, and I have yet to have a review scheduled, which is frustrating. I am really hoping for another raise this year, but I won't necessarily be disappointed if it doesn't happen. But I do have a wedding & honeymoon to pay for so some extra dough would be really really awesome :)

I can't believe the holidays are here already! I am trying to think of some unique, crafty items to get my friends/family and I'm coming up empty! I can't afford much in the way of gifts this year, so I need to find some good alternatives! Open to suggestions though.

I always seem to end up writing these right before I need to go to bed. Oh well! Until next time!

Hmm. Here I go!

This is day one of my blog. I've always thought blogging was cool. So I'm giving it a whirl. Why should anyone read this? Well, pull up a chair and listen to a little story.

I just turned 30. Three months ago, I got engaged. About 9 months ago, said fiance and I landed a sweet sweet apartment in Brooklyn. A year and a half ago, I landed what might possibly be my dream job. Nearly 4 and a half years ago, I landed said fiance. So it seems like things are just going peachy for me, right? Well, not so much...

Sometimes in life, and especially in life, we get ourselves into these little predicaments that make all of the really awesome stuff look just kinda ok. For example:

In 2006 I entered a Masters program at NYU (which shall remain nameless). It appears that, due to the complete lack of professionalism, good sense and compassion of said Masters program staff, I will probably not be graduating. Why? I am an exhibit designer. As in museum exhibits. By some strange act of fate, my first project at my really awesome design firm happens to be a 50,000 sq. foot, multi-million dollar museum....in Charlotte, NC. Us creative types a) don't make tons of $$, 2) work insane hours (and in my case, travel to our project sites frequently), have frequent and often unrealistic deadlines that we have to meet, and are generally understaffed, and c) happen to want to move ourselves up in stature in this very small creative museum world by getting additional degrees. Hmph. Well, this degree is hanging in the balance and appears to be tipping in the NO-GO favor. Of course, I still have to pay for every last minute that I participated in this program regardless of whether I get a stinkin' piece of paper to show for it or not. There's much more to be said here, but I won't bore with more details. More will come, I promise

And speaking of finances... I have a wedding pay for!!!!! Yeah. Which, in theory is really great. But I get to live like a pauper for the next year because a massive chunk of that pocket change I make called a salary is getting stashed away for what I hope to be a very worthwhile event! However, sticker shock is a bi***! Does everything wedding-related really need to be this expensive? Which leads me to issue 2: I have been working and traveling for work so much in the last month and a half that I have not been able to devote ample time to the best thing ever: planning my wedding!! It makes me sad. Especially since there are just too many awesome places to do the deed within a hundred mile radius of Brooklyn, and I just have so little time....

In a nutshell, my life is nothing short of insane right now. But I thought maybe someone out there might benefit from reading about my insanity and how to deal! Over the course of the next year or so, I will attempt to drop some wisdom about 3 W's (yes, I was an English major): Wealth, Weddings and Work, and how to successfully (ehem, or unsuccessfully as might be the case) manage all three, all the time! I'll provide a little backstory on each of these on another day, but for now, I need to conserve my energy for Work tomorrow!